How do I get over what he has done?

this year has been rough. My son has had two surgeries and my Dad died with cancer. My husband should have been there for me emotionally but instead he started and online affair with some chic in Cali and almost left. He told me it was over and two weeks later I found out they had secretly been talking. She confessed and gave me access to their secret account. They were sharing "personal " pics of themselves and professing their love for one another and how he would rather be with her than me. He says it wasn't real and that i was pushing him away. Yeah right! He claims its finally over and so far I haven't seen were they have been talking. But I still dont trust him as far as I can throw him and he still isn't there for me. He honeslty thinks that as long as he isn't doing anything wrong we should try to put it behind us. Fine! But to act like it never happened isn't making me feel any better. He hasn't done anything to make up Just says he'll make it up to me somehow.